I started dating this guy quite recently. I'm a bit new in this relationship stuff but things had been going well so far. However, about two weeks ago we were talking about secrets and he said he had a terrible one he could tell no one. Naturally I got curious and started a guess game. In the end, he didn't tell me what it was. I became a bit paranoid after that as he was serious about it. I thought he had comitted a crime of some sort, and that idea terrified me.
So this weekend I pressed him to talk. At some point, I was feeling a bit bad 'cause I knew I was walking on thin ice but I couldn't stop. Then he revealed that it was something sexual and technically not a crime. I thought he maybe had a strange fetish but he said no, it wasn't that and then asked me "please stop trying to guess".
I stopped and we entered a cab to go back to my place. Then it hit me. I knew what it was and the worst part was that there had been signs for some time now.
To put things in context, he's lived basically his whole life away from his dad part of the family and been around for only 2-3 years. My best friend (his cousin) told me that she saw their aunt try and kiss him once while she was a bit drunk but he refused her back then. But I know the woman and she is very affectionate to him and seems always in need of attention. I mean, she's nice and funny in general, but there was something a little off about their relationship. Almost intimate.
When we got home, I was crying. I was a little guilty for pressing him, a little disgusted by my own thoughts. When I finally told him what was on my mind, he gave up and said I was right. The thing is, it supposedly happened only a couple of times. But I don't know how to act. I still like him but the whole thing makes me feel nauseated, I can't stop picturing him with her. He says he doesn't regret it exactly, he's mostly afraid of the consequences if the rest of the family finds out. How should I feel about this? He tells me they never did it anymore, it's been over a year since they did for the last time and that now he thinks of her as mother and helps her with her current romantic affairs, as nothing really matters anymore. But he sleeps sometimes at her place when in town when he can't stay at mine. Should I feel jealous? Am I getting into something really screwed up and the best option is to back out now? I really do like him and the fact that he was honest with me does count too. But I feel insecure, I feel wrong. I don't know what to think about both of them. Who am I to judge? Things happen. But could they happen again? Even something as uncommon as this?