Hello Thinkingloud: So... since this was your first post here on PC... welcome to PsychCentral... from the Skeezyks! May you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

Well... everything you wrote makes perfect sense to me. From my perspective, you're correct. This is your brother's secret not yours. But it also makes sense that even though you want so badly to tell him what you think of him, & what he did to you, it's scary. Plus you do have to take into consideration the impact this might have on other family members & your relationships with them. Perhaps, in the best of all possible worlds, this would not be a consideration. But the reality is that it is.

I don't know that I have any words of wisdom I can offer. I do think it's a good thing that you're seeing a therapist. Hopefully this person can help you to figure out the best way to proceed. It's a difficult situation. The one thing I will say is that you didn't cause any of this. And it's not your responsibility to carry the burden at the expense of your own happiness. So from my perspective, as long as it is done thoughtfully & with consideration, whatever you need to do in order to heal is okay. I send healing thoughts your way with the hope that you will be able to find peace within...