This week chalanges are almost getting to the end.
This week should be our week to celebrate, the academic week, full of activities for the students from my university.
I have been avoiding things all my life. In my first years at faculty I went to parties, but it was to painful for me. In the same way I skipped all the theoretical lessons because I couldn't stand seeing all my classmates sitting together and ignoring me.
I hate I did this things for the reasons I did, I which this last six years were better. Everybody leaves faculty with a bunch of happy memories from happy moments and good time spent with friends. My memories are isolation, anxiety, sleeping and those from the different moments of my struggle.
So, I go, at least to the most important events of the week. In the Sunday I got my high hat and my bengala and tomorrow is the parade. This are suppose to be meaningfull...
I didn't sleep to much on Sunday, so it was pretty awfull. I was suppose to be happy, my family came to watch the cerimony, we had lunch together. I ask many people to hit my hat (it is like wishing good luck), but trully, I didn't feel like doing that, but I have to.
Now I have to endure like three hours of parade with my classmates, picture posing, trying to be happy and sentimental to them...and I am not going to anything else.
Most people like this week because of the parties. They go all night long with music shows and mini-bars selling drinks. The first year I went with my classmates, the second year and the next two I went with my sister friends (who are not my friends) and last year I didn't go. People make this a very big deal, so I feel sad for not going, for not have anyone I want to go with, and for not having fun at the things I go.
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