I am mad.
I go to my psychologist (new one that works in the psych ward) because of depression, I mention that I have some episodes where I am lost and I tell her that I think it's because of dissociation. She then continue with 2 sessions of how we reincarnated into D.'s body (the original) when she fell into clinical death. Okay fine maybe, maybe not. She then proceeds to tell me that if we wanted normal life we should leave.. Which have to be plain suicide because D. is dead. She begins to tell me that D. is still alive, even though by what Evee told me D. f..... died when she was 1. The psychologist then tells me that I am a liar because I didn't told her earlier, even though I learnt it after our first session.. I then start crying because I am so hurt from her telling me that I am a liar, which I am not, and Waidth takes control as a defence mechanism. We nearly kept him steady in place because he wanted to choke her. Carolinae then proceeds to take control because she is the calmest. She asks if we can leave that aside and work on my personal problems. We then do that for 10 minutes because that was the time left. I'm mad right now. I'm mad and upset maybe a bit triggered because I am starting to get my stress ticks. If I am jealous of one thing that is that you guys in the bigger, richer countries have amazing mental health systems and people that are trained. I hate England and Germany, nothing personal I just don't like it, but if I need to go there for my mental health so I can find someone who understands me I would move there. I would move anywhere if there is a person who can understand and help me, because in here, they tell you that you are crazy for things that are not. They imagine your problems without asking you. And I hate that.
Sorry for my rant I just needed to let it out because that will haunt me through that whole day.
On other news I am getting anti-psychotics tomorrow.. at least one thing will be fixed, hopefully.
-Thanks for reading, Scar
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