Those times when you just want to believe you are worth something, that people care and like when you are around, but you know that they do not. Where is the light? Where is life? Where is anything? Is it too hard to ask that people care and love me, that I am worth it, that I can be worth something one day? I guess it is. I know my parents and siblings love me, but I feel they have too because I am their daughter/sister. Sad times, I guess.
Sometimes I just hate who I am, who I have become, and I want to change. I want to feel my emotions, but I am so scared. I don't even know how t feel most emotions anymore. I just feel brief emotions through the day, or a deep sadness. What is a girl to do? To say? I don't know any more. And I don't think I ever will. What can I find worth living in the world, find worthwhile to let my emotions finally shine through? To feel happiness? What is happiness? What can be happy? I feel that everything is out of my hands, and I can't control anything! Everything is gone! I can't do anything! And it never ends. So I ask once again, what is a girl to do? To say? Nothing. I'm not even sure what emotions are. I'm not sure why I am writing this, but I am. And it just is. Sorry, guys. Just a bit of much needed venting. I seem to have posted a lot on here in the past two days. You don't have to read this if you don't want to. But you already have if you get to this point. Sorry!