I just keep thinking, if only I had known the last time we made love would be the LAST time we made love, I would have savored it, made sure I didn't forget it. Now all I can do is cry and I can't even do it on his shoulder. I am very scared because I do not work and I am not on disability, I'm just a stay at home mom. I feel like this is about the worse thing that has ever happened to me. And, I'm afraid of really losing touch again, getting hospitalized, and then losing the primary custody that we both agree I should have.

My therapist has agreed to let me come in again this week because I just don't know how to process all that is happening. I just feel so betrayed.