I am not sure if this is appropriate so i will try and not go into too much detail.

There are some sexual fetishes that involve liking being hurt. Some of them are harmless while others can be dangerous. Its embarrassing to admit but I have one of these things called ball busting ( the name is self explanatory). It is very harmful and i am scared of long term damage that I may regret. I know this but i still cannot stop.

I am wondering if this is caused by mental illness. Some antidepressants I have been on in the past seemed to help reduce my craving for it. But my current Ad (wellbutrin) is making me want it all the time.

My wife agrees to take part but she also worries. I have not told my psychiatrist yet as I am not sure if it is due to depression or jut what I like.

DO you guys think this is a kind of self harm? does any one manage to solve a similar problem? if yes I would appreciate some advice