I really don't understand what I have read and learned about teaching clients how to regulate and control their emotions in therapy sessions. I understand we can't go around having emotional outbursts every day in life, butt why can't it be ok to lose control in sessions?

I have a therapist that I think the world of and I believe he has a genuine heart to help, but I know he is scared of the level of upset I have shown a couple of times. I understand that he fears that I will become so upset I will have a physical problem, but what he sees is my attempts to stop the emotions when they start because I know nobody can handle them. The worst part is he has decided that it is critical to help me learn how to control the emotions to make sure they can't overtake me and cause a physical problem. I know what I want more than anything in the world and would help more than anything in the world is to finally be somewhere safe enough and okay enough to lose control and no I won't lose myself and now all I can think is how that will never happen because I have scared him with what he has already seen and he thinks the best thing is to help me learn control. I have explained to him that I can control it and stop it, and I am beginning to do so but it is killing me that I know that my hope of ever being able to let this out is gone.

I understand that there is a lot of concern about retraumatization in therapy and because of that many therapists want to make sure the client is always safe which makes sense, but I also wonder how many people are out there that just need to have a safe place to explode and then they might be able to handle so much more and wouldn't need training or teaching on how to control it. For many people including myself, I think controlling it is one thing that we have absolutely perfected. I do understand that what is meant is not stuffing it in controlling it but learning how to regulate and manage it, but I sure wish my therapist was strong enough to be able to handle it instead of deciding I needed to learn better how to control it. Now all I want to do is stuff it back away so it doesn't have to be seen again.