I believe every mistake is a teachable moment, that as a parent I need to discuss with my child (age 13) the thought processes, decisions, consequences of every wrong choice (right choice too!). Mistakes such as lying about homework and sneaking cereal bars into her room (several of them a week). My wife believes in the harsh punishment regimen. We argue a heck of a lot--I call her too harsh, she calls me too soft. I don't want to be permissive, but I don't believe harsh punishment works in the long run.