Yeah im dealing with a lot and hurting myself is nothing new for my family or my therapist or anyone who knows me.im in the hospital a lot for trying to end my life though there usually failed attempts i just got out of the er last twice for suicide attempts no one in that er cared.know why?im a hopeless cause that's what they know i come in after an overdose i resist help i hurt myself more i try to leave the works and they say it's all for attention so they use as an excuse to treat or rather not treat me with decent care.in honesty im very impulsive in hospitals and i have a hard time controling myself when i feel trapped or cornered somewhere.i want to go to a crisis center but if there are no beds there will send me to a locked mental facility and i can't handle that.so i dont know what to do in the meantime i cut to cope with my thoughts but its only a temporary fix the suicidal thoughts keep poping up sometimes even when im cutting its down right scary. My friend is going through a lot i guess she has some crazy roommates and she went blind recently a year or two ago so shes adjusting i do worry about her but i don't think i can get much information due to confidentiality if she is in the hospital i will know if i dont see her next Thursday as we have group together

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