My best friends are those I met when I lived in St Louis. They were there for my first inpatient stay. They saw me at my absolute worst, and I will always love them for that even after moving many many miles away. We still talk and I have gone back for visits and vice versa. Over the years my friendship circle has become much much smaller to the point where I can count on one hand how many people I actually like and trust. And two of them are the two I first mentioned. I'm over getting hurt and just have that wall closed for business. My family are my friends now. These friendships are more superficial in my opinion. Just people to talk to.