Spiritual mentor I went to for emotional help : "Just do mindfulness meditation. Don't let anyone see your emotions. Emotions are harmful to others. Just meditate and let it go. If you can't pretend to be happy keep it to yourself. Don't share your emotions with anyone."
After controlling everything, thoughts and emotions, and doing meditation for 6 months for 45 minutes a day I was so locked up and dissociated and alienated from everyone I had an episode of uncontrollable shaking that lasted a month and a half. I'm still recovering.