Does anyone else have this problem?

It seems like I alienate everyone. I don't like to socialize because of this, as well as the fact that socializing makes my symptoms worse. The worst part is that I don't usually know what I've said or done to piss people off. It's been over a year since I went to my neighbors' party. I told them many times over the years why I don't socialize, and they kept telling me it'd be fine. So I went to three parties. It was the third one that did it.

They don't talk to me anymore. Their extended family members act like I'm invisible if I wave or say Hi. This family told me to think of them as family. Since the deaths of my parents, they were the ones I counted on being able to call in an emergency, which I rarely did. It makes me feel horrible knowing that I did something to cause this alienation. I feel so alone now.

Added to this is the fact that I didn't get invited to my own family's graduations. That when I send money, I get no reply. My siblings say they'll call and I wait for the call, but it never comes.



I've been crying so much about this. I hate this.

And I still don't know what I said to piss these people off. My neighbors are very nice, laid back people, so it must've been bad. I feel so horribly guilty. And worthless. And alone.