Hey Everyone..

I will never forget... ever. Prior to it, never had a panic attack, never had anxiety, total normal (whatever that is) uni student, life was awesome...

I had to do jury duty on a really horrible case. third day, the accused person got up.. I freaked out, couldnt breathe, shaking, sweating.. in a room that was so quiet you could hear a pin drop, It took every ounce of energy for me not to run out of there. I felt like I was going to be sick.. turned to the lady next to me, didnt say anything, but I remember thinking, please help me, I dont know whats happening to me.. Anyways, there was a break, I ran into the toilets and tried to calm myself down. I had no choice but to go back in, it is so strict at the court, there was nothing I could do.. kept feeling like it when I went back in, the only think I could do was scribble on a piece of paper to distract myself, which didnt work!

I left there that day and never been in a court room since. That started a massive shock reaction, I was in a state of depersonalisation for about 3 weeks, and for the past 2 years have suffered generalised anxiety disorder..

I always wonder if I never went there in the first place, would I still not know what it feels like to have an anxiety disorder?

Take care everyone

Kel xx