People who aren't that close to me have NO idea how intense my moods and anxieties are, but I like to keep it that way. They don't need to know and it's none of their business. Maybe one day I can be more open about everything, but for right now I can't (I'm a music teacher and I have to remain professional and calm most of the time, even when I'm not at work). It kind of sucks to have to be so private and secretive. But on the other hand, it helps to maintain certain friendships by not delving too deeply into the craziness. Does that make any sense?