Upon reflection mine have felt different.
The very first severe one I had I was just numb. And I was twitchy. Loud noises freaked me out (I remember standing on a bridge, contemplating jumping, and the cars were so loud! A truck went by behind me and I almost had a heart attack). I would start easily. Things seemed slow (I remember staring at a sprinkler and it looked like it was in slow motion and the water reflecting in the sun was too bright. I mean, it was painful to look at). Light was way too bright. Colors seemed too vivid. I was so anxious and freaked out all the time it made me sick.
That one ended when I was finally able to have a nice bawl.
The last severe one I had I was just pissed during it. There was a lot of pacing. I was agitated, irritated, wanted to scream because I couldn't stand how I felt. I lost like fifteen pounds in two months because I never ate. Anxiety through the roof. No numb feelings that time.
The best way too describe the overall feelings is that things seem out of focus, not right. Like if you wear glasses and your eye doctor is a moron and changes your prescription and everything becomes somewhat out of focus. It feels like things shift over. I don't feel right. It feels like my bottom drops out.
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"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
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