I get it.
So you binge drink when she is away.
oh well it is not the end of the world, you are being hard on yourself.
let go of that.
When my hubby is away I am on the internet for like 7 hours at a time. Not good.
I too am a binge drinker.
AA is a cult IMO....
As long as you are safe and not driving-....
I am sorry that you don't have any friends.
is there any way you could try to rekindle any of your famly ties?
It is good that you have come here to post. People here will listen to you.
and I will never judge you about your drinking.
bizi