Hi guiltier,

The fact that you haven't been to the group in three weeks because digging into the past is too painful, in my eyes, does not make you a failure
The past can sometimes be incredibly painful, and it can be a natural sense of self-preservation/protection and a completely understandable fear that puts the brakes on going too deep into it..........the fact that you're struggling with it is completely understandable
But you have been trying, and you have reached out to others and made yourself vulnerable to us on here too...........just that sometimes it can be a journey acknowledging and dealing with the past, and you need to go at your own pace and maybe have the right support in doing that. Going at it faster than you're ready to can cause you even more problems than you'd otherwise have
So..........it definitely sounds like you needed a bit of a break from the group and the pressure you've been feeling yourself under...........but now...........how about going to the group "just to be there", just to feel the kind of support they can offer for when you're ready to go just a little deeper into your past??
There shouldn't be any expectations on members of any group to "go further than they are willing/able" so no need to say more than that.........it's just you're there and they're there for you if/when............as are we

Alison