I assume you don't want to go because of the incessant emotional beatings you get from this woman. Understandable. What is the need? Does she somehow nourish or enrich you, or provide something that is healthy for you? Does the good outweigh the bad? [Q's for your to ponder -- you don't have to answer me]

I hope you can find your truth, and, honor it whatever that may be. Good luck!