the mind and its many facets are truly fascinating...

even through the misery i can appreciate the brilliance of it and the enormous amount of power the mind generates..

we can be blissfully happy, while on our death bed dieing in agony...
we can be totally oblivious to pain and misery surrounding us through out the day, seeing the good things and acknowledging the positive..
we can be in total agony and feel such pain while being the healthiest person on the planet (physically)
we can walk through the day seeing only pain and suffering even when walking through the most beautiful blissful environment

our experience seems to be subjective... but who is the subject?
what constitutes a normal healthy happy experience?
what IS happy?

contemplating this one would think we could mould our perception into a pleasant experience for ourselves..

but we can only do so much consciously..? so we have to wonder what is the subconscious..
these must be our programs that we are taught.. the world has implanted in us from a young age..
and if so much is controlled by the subconscious, and they have implanted these programs to manipulate our subjective experiences.. why?
instead of instilling within us pleasant things?

can the subconscious constantly be changed? or is it something that is formed and solidified at a certain point forming what we will experience in life to come..?
is the subconscious even part of us? or within the mind? how many levels of consciousness is there? are we on some levels connected through a form of consciousness and that why our subjective experience seems to be influenced so much by something outside?

people should become more interested in the mind.. and less interested in the physical aspects of what we seem to think we understand when it is all a perception of what we create within.. each persons experience is different, so how can we objectify things and say "this is what this is" when the next person may see it completely different but totally agree because he thinks the other see's the same thing as he?

we have no idea what LIFE is
but we are thrown into the violent stream of things every day to try to survive and convince ourselves that we do...

i for one dont understand.. and am not sure why i can't control my perception or the subjective experience that i create within...
but maybe others don't have such violent storms raging within either..

they say curiosity killed the cat, but did the cat discover something that they didnt want him to know and they killed him instead?
preserve the illusion, dont free the people, keep us all chained to our own mental prison and let us believe we are free... people have become happy with this..
and maybe even afraid to take the chains off... because they dont want to be curiosity, the dead cat...

i apologize, i hope that i dont offend anyone - i am just arguing with myself..
much love... explore the mind...