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Old May 12, 2016, 05:58 PM
adashofhope adashofhope is offline
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Member Since: May 2016
Location: US
Posts: 75
Quote:
Originally Posted by basicgoodness View Post
I have suicidal thoughts every day, but I keep them to myself. I certainly can't confide in my wife. Her father committed suicide and she becomes enraged if I even hint about wanting to kill myself. It is hard, though, walking around wanting to die and trying not to show it.
Yeah it really is. I want my husband to be happy and I know telling him those types of things definitely have the opposite effect as I have learned. When the feelings and thoughts seem to overtake me though, its like its hard to control. I feel really bad about it. Also, I think I am just desensitized the whole thing because I've dealt with it so long and I don't know how it feels for other people to hear that when its not something they have struggled with (at least not in the same way - I know its normal to think about suicide for most people on occasion, but not constantly).