Quote:
Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight
This is more how mine is and has been since childhood. For me, it's a part of OCD. Like if I don't, say, worry about getting cancer, then it might happen. Or if something good happens to me, then something bad will inevitably happen to balance it out. (I get pregnant my first month of trying and had a generally easy pregnancy, so, hey, maybe that's why my daughter is on the autism spectrum.) Or, more karma-like, if I do something bad, then something bad will have to happen to me (or someone I care about), like as punishment.
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Lonesome- I too got pregnant on the first try, 15 years ago, and that daughter is also the autism spectrum, so I get what you are saying. I have felt a similar guilt, especially because my brother and his then-wife were struggling to get pregnant at the time, and never ended up being able to have kids. I felt so guilty. I have a sort-of similar weird thing about masturbation and airplane trips. I am fine "flying solo" most of the time, but within 1 week of flying anywhere, I will not indulge, because I am convinced the plane will go down. Gah. I'm not even religious so I don't know where this thought even comes from...but it's been there for as long as I can remember.