My heart goes out to you. I experienced my first manic episode before ever touching drugs. I experienced my first psychosis while on Amphetamine. I worry and believe that if I never touched the drugs, my illness would not be so bad. if I didn't experience mania before ever trying any street drugs, I would definitely question any diagnosis I was given. I do believe drugs made me worse though. I'm not sure of the science behind what I believe, I just know it to be true in my case. I get the same type of psychosis now, even after nearly 2 decades off the drug. Can flashbacks happen decades later? I wonder what the science says.