Have you discussed this with a therapist?

I see many similarities in both your and my stories. I am 55, by the way.

I discussed my sex issues with my existing therapist (opposite gender), and she has helped with my understanding of my situation. Because of my discussion with her, I have recently started seeing a trained Sex Therapist, who has addressed topics my therapist wasn't trained to discuss (such as my experiences, positions, methods and techniques).

And while things aren't perfect, they are improving. I even posted my profile on dating sites, and have had a few dates. Unfortunately, I live in a rural area, and the women I dated were too far away to establish long-term courtships. But I have just started seeing someone local and things look promising.

So I think you should seek out someone to help you.