My mixed states are ironic

One time I was like, "I WANT TO DO EVERYTHING. THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS TO DO, BUT SO LITTLE TIME. I CAN'T PICK!!! ......but also, everything is boring. I can't actually do anything."

lol.

Another time I was like, "Wow, I feel so f***ing horrible. I just want to die... Should I just kill myself now and get it over with? Well, I'll think about that later because I have to work." Then I left for work at 4:30am and got there at at 4:45 because I was driving 100mph on the highway. I got SO many things done, but was weeping at my desk nearly the whole time.