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Old May 16, 2016, 01:19 PM
Icare dixit's Avatar
Icare dixit Icare dixit is offline
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Member Since: Feb 2016
Location: A version of earth
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Quote:
Originally Posted by smallwonderer View Post
You manic again? . I don't think nearly that highly of myself unless I'm seriously zonked out. I suppose the point is that mental illness + intelligence is not necessarily always a good thing. I only work with professors, and many of the most successful succeed not because they are particularly intelligent in an IQ kind of way.

Though when I was surrounded by mentally ill people in the hospital and pretty sick myself, I thought they were all speaking genius to me and I thought it was weird the doctors couldn't understand, like I had some special power (like I said I was manic...).
Maybe I'm always manic. But most PhD students, for what it's worth, I speak to (no professor is ever going to admit such a thing and if intelligent don't care too much) enjoy speaking to me more than other PhD students—about their research (and lots of other stuff; not too much of course, most being more paranoid about it then I am on a bad day about things).

I do agree it doesn't mean high intelligence per se that you achieve a lot at university. Doing a PhD is in many ways rather stupid, to be honest. And I don't care much about intelligence and much less still about IQ or anything so reductive (or it must be doing things right, like my own theories. ).

I do believe and readily admit it could all be delusional. I really don't care much. At least it allows me to excel given my range of intelligence, which is very, very broad.

Personality-wise I am a, subsyndromal, narcissist, but I wasn't really honest which would make it still subsyndromal I guess.

I am definitely not worse than many with ASD, which universities are full of, in being honest about my intelligence. But I also don't care and never bring it up, unless asked for here (I am far more socially acceptable in normal situations, but nobody seems to need verification while always commenting about my intelligence to others, it seems).

But I am not more manic than I am normally when not depressed. Rather stable. That's my stability: I am rather continuously cycling at least a bit.
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Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide.
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Last edited by Icare dixit; May 16, 2016 at 01:55 PM.