Quote:
Originally Posted by newtothis31
This is well-expressed and I wish there was an easy answer. My memories of having hypomania- yes there are moments where things appear to be more beautiful than words and there's euphoria but for me there was a cruelMissing joy is not acceptable. We have to get that back! You deserve it! crash in how fleeting and unattainable it was to have that feeling stick around for a lasting period of time.
I'm almost two years past my initial diagnosis. Some of the things I find joy in are in things that I couldn't do prior to my diagnosis. Prior to my diagnosis, I had crippling anxiety and I had a lot of social phobias about making friends and maintaining my friendships. While I was still able to have some close friendships pre-diagnosis, I've found that my post-diagnosis friendships have been better balanced. Now I'm the friend that can make other people laugh.
Maybe consider trying out some travel, getting a museum membership, walking a labyrinth, or doing some volunteer work. I've also developed some new hobbies- I love working my way through Angie Grace coloring books. For me- certain experiences are not the same as they were since being diagnosed- for example, it's harder for me to appreciate really good music. If you try to open yourself up to new experiences and new memories- making stability a positive thing- it really feels great.
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This is very good advice, thanks, especially the last line. I think I need to look forward instead of mourning parts of the past. And also remind myself of what happens after the ecstasy, which has ranged from crippling depression to psychosis. I also get to the point that I'm so jumpy, my whole body crawling with WAY too much energy, it's extremely uncomfortable and it's hard to function.
I do have a membership to an aquarium, which I love, the challenge is going back after my first time! I've come to looove sea otters, and this is new to me, as is taking long walks around a pond near where I live which I love (I recently moved to where I am now). So perhaps I should value these things more -as well as my stability- and not look so much to the past.
My anxiety has also improved from one of the medications I take for BP, and this is something to appreciate to no end. I still suffer with it, but it's not nearly as bad as it used to be.
I do want my mood to be more expansive and less constricted, though, and am going to look at lessening a medication; we'll see how it goes.
All good advice though -thanks.