projections are often not conscious-- until someone points them out, we are seldom aware of them....... </font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I have never thought about him in any conscious way while fighting. I just seem to like to hurt people that I think deserve it.

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one other thing I meant to note was you could also be experiencing PTSD-- post traumatic stress disorder. You seem to have "triggers"-- over react to events that bring back past feelings which occurred from past events.
There is a book by Judith Herman, Trauma and Recovery-- a psychologist I was seeing recommended it. Though it's from mostly experiences of females and sexual abuse, there are sections in it that you might relate to-- being subjected to physical abuse as well as emotional.

I also know of a great website with articles written by a therapist that counsels people with PTSD-- he comes from the background and so can relate very well with the struggles like explosive anger and not getting close to others and other subjects. I can PM(private message) the site to you if you are interested.

mandy