Quote:
Originally Posted by mulan
Thank you for your answear.
I know it very well, the theory.
Let me just say one thing, I sincerely believe that's the rule, independently of me doing or not the right thing. And now that I think about it (and I am not sure I did or did not realize this before) that is probably my biggest fear and the thing that I always expect to happen. I think people won't like me and if they do they will quickly come to their senses. So I am aware all the time about the signals people do that show that and when it happens I just step asside because I hate beeing a burden.
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But "people" is too general. Some people will like you, some won't. Regardless, everybody I know wants to be respected, and loved. If I do not pay attention to them, sooner or later I will miss their attention, love, or whatever. But if I pay attention to them, there is no guarantee I will get anything good enough back. Unfortunately I have to take the risk. This is difficult for me right now. I am trying to avoid risks.
But, on the other hand, my depression does not help. Sometimes, I don't want to see anybody (although I resent if nobody seems to care about me). Sometimes I make the decision not to continue cultivating some relationships because I feel they do not understand me. And, again, it is risky, because maybe these are the only ones that care about me (even they may not be the best for me). Sometimes, I cannot deal with people whatsoever. I just can't . But if I can't , how can I expect people would like to deal with me? Unless I was there for them when they needed me...
It is complicated.
But you are right: it is a good start when we learn to accept ourselves as we are in the present moment