It was the way you presented your thinking that brought out the reply I made.

I stuck out a bad marriage for 33 years before I finally was able to walk (run) away....2100 miles away. I no longer had any family holding me. The last 13 years of that marriage were so miserable without my career to hide away in. I didn't realize that all my suicide attempts were really my desire to escape being trapped in the marriage, not overreacting to the loss of my career as therapy seemed to imply.

I was very independent & working on degree & computer engineering career. I talked myself out of the red flags I saw dealing with his personality assuring myself that an educated person could be nothing like my dad. After I finally left, trying to sort through my life, I read a book on ASD & all the characteristics & came to realize that both my H & dad were/had been(my dad died way back in late 80's) were somewhere on the somewhat high functioning end of the Autistic spectrum. Enlightening information for me....it wasn't until after I left that I was able to learn how to communicate in a normal way without being looked at like I was the one with the problem.

I understand where you are coming from...but your logic & reasoning puts you in the bad guy place & leaving your wife stuck because of just your desire for passionate love....which even in the best marriages doesn't continue...but at least they have an emotional connection.

Maybe you are incapable of emotional connection. I know it was missing in my marriage but that is one of the characteristics of an ASD person & I never learned about it from my home life because of my dad & my mom was totally dysfunctional in her own way also.

Maybe you need to learn about emotionally connecting with people rather than just throwing away your wife. MAYBE neither of you know how to emotionally connect & that is what is creating the problem