I keep have thoughts about doing something even though I could never go through with it. I just can't take it anymore. I've been seeing my T weekly since the beginning of the year and I feel like I'm making no progress at all and even further away from reaching my goals. I've been taking antidepressants since December last year and I don't believe they're helping. Also, they are causing excessive sweating and consequently I am trying to taper off them right now.

The other thing is I've had to start seeing my T fortnightly due to financial reasons. Right now is the first two week gap between sessions and I'm not coping well at all. I have become so attached to my T and I feel like I can't function without her. I'm literally obsessed with her. I don't know if it is a combination of this and tapering off my mess but I just wish I could go to sleep and never wake up.