IMHO, if you want to have success with online dating, you shouldn't focus in on just one person. It's a numbers game. Try to send out as many messages to as many women you find attractive as possible. Also, I find most people on free dating sites like OKCupid aren't looking to invest in a relationship. Granted, some may be, but what most people are looking for is casual sex. If that's what you're looking for, ok, I won't judge. If you want a dating site where there are more women looking for something more serious than that however, Match.com or eHarmony might be worth looking into. Those sites require payment for their services and you know that any woman who is going to pay for features on a dating site is more serious than one who uses a free site. That's just the advice I was given. Hope it helps you. Good luck!