Ok, I realise not everyone can answer these questions, but that's not unusual here, us all being different. Bear with me.

Those with BPD, do you ever feel like you just have a borderline personality and your BP is just a form of self-damaging behaviour and maybe you even buy in to the "attention seeking" explanation for that?

I don't know honestly. But that's just my current state. It's just when I think about my behaviour, my personality, the disordering disordered part.

I do believe that it's not just BPD and that a psychotic disorder underlies BPD (which is a reaction, a coping/defence mechanism for it), I'm just not sure whether it would be BP without BPD, whether BP (or schizomania) underlies BP or something more "formless", more potent, undifferentiated, more malleable, pliable. Maybe (even) schizophrenia rather than BP.