You couold sit down on a quiet place and write down your feelings, almost mathematically. At least it is what I do. I write down (people on here probably now i'm a big fan of lists haha) what I feel and I ask myself 'where does that feeling come from ? when did i first get that feeling ?' But do not spend too much time digging up the past because it would only hurt me, and I just write down, keywords. What is making you unhappy ? is a good question to ask yourself. This is the first task. The second one would be to look for solutions. How can you improve what is making you unhappy ? I know it is very hard to do that when one suffers from mental illness like bpd and others but it is worth a try.
It by no means heals you, it keeps you busy and makes you investigate your own pain. If you see a therapist, you could bring these 'lists'.

I really hope you have good support from professionals as it is awful to stay in that pain.



I am so sorry you feel like that.