Hi Rayna, I am just reading through this post. The past few days I just did not have the ability to read something about death. I am facing my fathers eventual death from alcoholism now. Also, i have lost others to the disease.

I am uplifted by your ability to turn such a tragedy into a positive--I say that with the utmost respect to the woman who died.

My brother in law was a depressed alcoholic--he shot himself a couple years ago. When I drove his daughters to the grave site from the funeral home, I kept trying to think of something to say...what kept coming to mind was the thought that he had finally found peace--I believe we will all find peace in death. He was a miserable alcoholic--life for him was torture--I believe he found peace from the alcohol and depression the only way he knew how. He had tried AA numerous times, been through several rehabs, been on medications...he had done it all, but just could never stay sober. AA talks about those who are unable to be honest with themselves and so can't get sober (something like that). Unfortunately, I think he was one of those people.

When I think of him I think of the good times we had and I thank him for showing me his path in life. I have been near suicide...after seeing the devastation his death caused, I know I would never want to put my family through that. He is a constant reminder for me to keep working in my recovery from addiction and depression--the 2 can be a deadly combination. I love Mike. He went down a dark road so that I do not have to...but for the grace of god, there go I...