My T worked from home, and our sessions were outside, so animals in general featured quite heavily. He kept sheep, who I absolutely adored. We usually walked through their field on the way out and on the way back, and I loved to stopping to chat to them. It must have been quite strange for T to see this closed off, unavailable, untouchable person suddenly hugging and kissing sheep! My last session was TOUGH, and I was trying to explain why I was mad at him, when all of a sudden in the distance a sheep moved, and it totally looked like a sheep was coming out of his ear. It was a fabulous and wonderful distraction that helped keep the mood elevated.

T had several dogs, who I never met. He often offered to bring one in to session, and I was very tempted. Theres a good chance if the dog came over and wanted to cuddle I would probably burst out crying and not stop (I don't cry ever normally). The fear of that happening was insignificant though compared to the real headspin and reason why I never said yes to the dog attending. I got it in to my head that my T wanted the dog in session for several reasons. Absolutely it would be therapeutically beneficial. But his dogs are his soul mates, and I think he was scared of me, so I think he saw having the dog in session as protection against me - and that thought just devastates me - that he would need protecting from me. Im not scary! But it doesn't stop there, because even if he wanted the dog for protection I would still want the experience of dog company. But then I worry that the dog will pick up on his fear of me, and the combative relationship we have-dogs are so in tune with their owners feelings - and so I get really scared the dog will attack me because of that. (My mums dog did that a couple of years ago and bit my face and left me with a cut forehead and two black eyes). I never told my T any of this, because I didn't want to hear him say he fears me.