I don't obsess about my therapist per se, but I do have a strong tendency to ruminate. In my first round of therapy, I had no outside contact, and if something had upset me I would ruminate about it all week. This tended to be quite damaging to me, and I had no way of knowing how to deal with it. I would often become extremely distressed. The whole experience was deeply retraumatizing, and I became really haunted by the idea that I was totally alone, and that no one would help me. (This despite having a strong network of friends and family. But we were dredging up such strong memories of situations where I had been alone and traumatized in early childhood, and i had no way of coping with these in just one hour a week.)

I have outside contact now so this is no longer a problem. When I have been overwhelmed I have been able to work with my therapist on a plan to get me moving again. I can reach out if I need to clarify something. Through telephone coaching I've been able to develop my ability to stop the spiral downward. Being able to feel I can count on my therapist makes me feel I have a safety net, so there have been a few areas I've been willing to take more risks with, knowing that I can access support if I need it. I feel so strongly in my gut that my therapist is trying to help me, and will continue to do so. This has been enormously helpful to me.