I've been on and off meds of varying varieties and doses for 25 years. The combo I'm on now has worked the best for the longest. It evolved gradually increasing, decreasing, adding and removing. I do not do well off meds. I know it's all a guessing game of trial and error. I have never been on a mood stabilizer so the side effects of those scare me a bit (not knowing what to expect)

Nothing with me ever presents normally. I had mono as a teen and couldn't sleep.

They think I had parvovirus because they couldn't find another explanation that fit the symptoms.

I had my gall bladder out 8 years ago but was hospitalized with gall stones last year. My bloodwork still hasn't come down to baseline and there's no apparent cause.

I get a cough when I'm tired, sick, upset, stressed, and on exertion that can send me into bronchospasm but doesn't quite fit the asthma definition.

I had joint pain in my big toe that responded to the first line treatment for gout. Only problem is that nothing else about it fit a diagnosis of gout.

I'm used to feeling like a Guinea pig.

I don't know why giving what I'm feeling a different name bugs me so much.

To answer your original question the symptoms have likely been present since I was about 12 (onset of puberty). My mom always thought I had ADHD (high on the inattention side). I remember a lot of anxiety (didn't know what it was at the time, I was just afraid of everything). Sleep has been an issue ever since I can remember. First major depressive episode was at 14. I am constantly fidgety and always have been.

Until the report comes in I won't have all the information and that's the hardest part. I hate med changes I always feel wonky while one tapers off and another one kicks in but I know it's necessary. It's not the first time bipolar has been mentioned but I've never fit the cookie cutter diagnosis. My sister who knows me and my moods better than I do, and is also a physician, isn't disagreeing with the diagnosis and she would tell me if she thought it was way off base.

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