Quote:
Originally Posted by Marylin
I though it meant two people dependent on each other emotionally and physically where one person is ill or an alcoholic and the other tries to fix them,change them, make the problem go away but is actually making the habits more entrenched.Like a woman who will not leave a violent,abusive, alcoholic husband and devotes her time and energy to make him better then ignores the very real problems she herself has if she does not have someone to mother or make better.Codependents,need someone to mother,take care off because they are terrified of focusing on themselves and their own problems.
These relationships happen between husband's and wives, mothers and daughters, fathers and daughters/sons etc
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in general the term enable means to help a person yes but in psychological terms it means to help a person to remain disabled, remain mentally ill, help a person to not follow their treatment plans.
dependency in general terms means you can depend on someone else...i depend on my co workers to get their paperwork done which helps me to be able to do my part of the job.
but when you put dependency in the psychological term with the word enable it takes on a negative meaning where one persons happiness depends upon continuing another persons mental illness patterns.
the actual psychological definition here where I am is...
a condition where ones happiness, behaviors, mental and physical health problems depend upon another who is manipulating and controlling them as a way to allow their own happiness, negative behaviors,mental and physical health problems to continue.