One of my experiences with mixed episodes went something like this: One night around 2 AM I found myself in the bathroom on hands and knees, scrubbing the tiles with bleach and an old toothbrush, and bawling like a baby. I'd been fighting with dysphoric hypomania for around a week, and I just lost it. I cried until blood vessels burst in my eyes. Still don't know how it started, guess I'll never know. But I'll never forget how that felt.