Hi I'm not sure how to describe this but in therapy my t a few times after talking for a bit has asked me to tell her about anything in my life, how I'm feeling etc. I still haven't told her about the csa or sa from my ex but I really want to start on the csa stuff then maybe move onto my ex. Everytime she's said to tell her anything then I start panicking inside, fidget more and there's this strange feeling inside my chest that feeling like in shrinking or falling it's really hard to explain so then I change the subject as scared of when happened the first time where I zoned out and everything went black and I could hear my voice shouting inside my head. The only reason I came out of it was because t asked me what I am thinking which made me jump and then I deflected and started up a random conversation. She let me for a few minutes then she turned the conversation and I can't remember anything of it apart from saying I'm ok though and she said I know you are ok. Has anyone got any advice on how to disclose. I really need to as I'm feeling worse and worse after every time I see her as then I know I have to wait 2 weeks before I can try again. She won't allow emails or texts and I have to say everything so I can't write and give it to her. I need to find a way to drop it into the conversation