Quote:
Originally Posted by Wandering Soul
I know that this because of my parents. They were very critical, especially my father (he still is). What do you mean by who cares if I am awkward? Who would want to talk and be around an awkward person like me? There is a reason why I prefer to spend my time alone.
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(((Wandering Soul)))
Lots of people would want to be around someone like you!
Having experienced social awkwardness myself (which spiralled because of isolation, and fed into a big old whammo depression) I totally 'get' your description of your walk.
It was something I really had to work on, because deep down I needed social contact if not friends, and I actually liked people (well many of them anyway!) just got overwhelmed in some social situations.
What I found easiest, and still do, was small groups or one to one conversations. There is just so much outside stimulation in a larger group situation for me (I can handle this better now but still prefer smaller groups), so many conversations/agendas/personalities - I just can't keep track of it all.
Going back to you WS, and feeling judged, I think there are many people out there who would understand this and like you for who you are. One of my closest friends is a person who has had similar SA, and it's because we 'get' each other as we do that we are such good friends - we both had to work at that. There are so many different kinds of people out there, there will be people who understand your struggles.