I really think that most men, at least those that I have known, would like to have a more high-brow approach to fart humor, but that there is something that is a part of the Y chromosome that causes us to roll around on the floor breaking wind if we so much as hear the word, sometimes. One explosion, or even a gently broken puff or the suggestion of an oncoming, leads to another explosion and you'll soon have a roomful of two-dozen men laughing, farting and trying (hoping and praying) that they'll not need to actually leave the gathering because of a shart.

But farts (both vaginal and ****) play an important role in developing relationships with all manner of gender identification. I would be interested to know if Caitlyn/Bruce Jenner still finds farts funny. Or if he didn't even as a man. That may be the real sniff test to see whether a man truly identifies as a female - and vice-versa.

Farts are usually going to become a part of any long-term relationship, no matter the amount of gaseous etiquette one has learned. A guy will generally allow colon explosions to occur before willing to let loose on a first round with the naughty bits. But it happens. Doesn't matter who's in which position, bottom or top, breaking wind in a "69" position? That's the one that will be remembered by everyone involved forever.

There are also, though, the first "vaginal poots" If you've never given or received one PLEASE DO NOT rush out and blow wind up a woman's vagina!!! That can cause death. Literally. Seriously. It just takes the right positioning, enough everything, to achieve vagarts; I once believed that it was only something that happened with men with larger than natural penises and women with smaller than average vaginas. It's nervously funny the first time it happens but it really can be fatal and that's not worth even a good fart joke.

Male or female, experiencing your first fart in a relationship should be followed by laughter (at least, that's what I believe). Yes, women must pretended to be offended - particularly if it's an under-the-cover fart and you thrust her head under to capture the ripeness of the bouquet - but if you're giggling in the morning, everything's fine.

Now her first time for a fragrant blossom can be handled in many ways but it's a good time to show your more tender side... usually. I've had lesbian friends who get off on the practice, and have a name for it (which I can't remember just now).

I've no idea how women, when away from men, actually handle fart humor. Do they gather round the television in anticipation of the campfire scene in Blazing Saddles?

When I was in high school we had a guy who played B team and came back for Varsity the following years. All through spring he did nothing but fart. Even before pads. These were a different kind of nervous farts. These weren't nervous farts that anticipated death, this was gas from a man long dead. It was okay when the snow had passed and we could get outside. But those previous weeks were like playing "keep away from Dale." Literally getting as far away from Dale as possible. He was a linemen, I was a WR so we didn't clash too often.

The funny thing was that Dale knew that he had a gas problem. The school doc had him on these charcoal capsules that were supposed to make the gas better, make sure that it passed. He had a sense of humor about it. I have a lot of stories about Dale. He was a wonderful guy and he had a kind of warped sense of sin and scrupulosity. He liked to play "what kind of penance would you give" and he'd come up with a pretty ordinary sinner with some pretty ordinary sins BUT there would be a twist.

For Dale, there was humor in farting but there was something spiritual, too, I think. He would endow some of his penitents with it as penance, as a trial, etc.

I don't think that women see anything spiritual in farting - but I just have a hard time thinking that they see it without any humor at all.

Maybe it is a Y chromosome thing? I would hate to think that women just lack a sense of humor.