Now that I know the cause of most of my cancelled plans and isolation, I would say that I probably would have had more friends. I also would have probably had more company at my house because I would have had the energy to clean up. I would have probably had better grades in high school. Although I graduated with honors for my undergraduate degree, I would have had better grades if I had not have had the two semesters where depression really reared its ugly head.

On the other hand, I would not know the joy of getting high off of myself (mania). I would not have been able to run circles around my co-workers. I would not have been able to maintain the leadership position at work, pledge a sorority, serve at church, be a mom and wife, and maintain straight A's while working on my graduate degree.

Without bipolar disorder, I wouldn't be me. That's why I struggle with this whole meds thing -- it takes a piece of me away.