Thank you for your reply. She did unblock me after I unfriended her, and after some communication via a related site, we both reconnected online. I had not used FB that much and have never really been big on it, only through this sports fan group (to sort of answer your question) have I increased my FB involvement. It was just this kind of complication that I had wanted to avoid, but as they say, best laid plans. I do plan on limiting the online communication and being polite but keeping my distant when the in-person events happen.

For example, I didn't know what you pointed out: "PS If you do end up being friends again, remember that the unfriending and blocking stuff on FB isn't a form of communication; it's akin to slamming a door or punching a wall on the way out of a house." So I can see why she was quick to block me after I unfriended her. It still looks like she has me blocked on FB Messenger, which I guess is for the best.

I have talked about this with my therapist and it does seem like I end up in these unrequited love situations because it somehow allows me to pour my affections into someone who allows me to indulge in my emotional oversharing as I have heard it called. The fact that she was flirtatious at first also made it easier for me to think this was going to lead to some deeper relationship. And the fact that her concept of just friends includes sex jokes and talking about who she's dating and wants to sleep with and/or has slept with made me reciprocate and share my corresponding information along those lines. So it was pretty embarrassing to find out later that I was readng the whole situation wrong, and that she had no (or had quickly lost) romantic or erotic interest in me.

As of now, I am just stifling the emotional stuff until I can find a proper way to express it to someone else. It's sad to know that she and I will probably never talk that way again, but I also know it was feeling really awful to get more and more dependent on whether or not she would message me back or saying some little thing I thought was encouraging. She has been approached by other guys in the group and will probably be approached going forward, so I want to avoid knowing about that as much as possible and give short, noncommittal comments if she mentions it (as she did today).

I'll see how it goes. I also know part of this little dance we're doing is also about my envy of other men, who I see as getting more female attention than I do and as being more successful than I am. The only way I can work through that is by focusing on what I can do to contribute to the world and to improve myself, not by trying to entwine myself with women where we are not good matches for each other. I understand that intellectually but need to make it part of my actual core beliefs.

Thanks again.