Well, I've a lot of things I want to do, but I don't feel motivated, and can barely cry, anymore; I used to cry, quite easily, and get angry, but now, I feel just dull resentment.

Basically, I've been trying to find help confronting my family, but they've balked, and I'm now between counselors, at BHR.

Essentially, I'm considering publicly attacking my family on Facebook, calling them liars, etc; this is partly because I didn't get help confronting them more directly, one-on-one. I either need to attack them harder, or else perform a cleaner brake with them, and I ever have.

Trouble is, my family's been my support group, and I'll need a new one; that's one reason I haven't done this, before.

Basically, I imagine on ongoing confrontation between me, and my family, even as I used the energy derived from striking them down to propel me forward, and create new boundaries, for myself.

The thought of shrinks validating my contempt towards others, makes me feel happy, like I've made a difference, and that I'm fighting for principal, not like revenge, which is what too many claimed.

They guilt-tripped, and for that, I'm going to take public satisfaction in shaming, and humiliating them.

They were wrong, I was right, enough said; I think that equals control, and self-satisfaction, for me; working with someone to get my story in the paper, would be good, and someone calling losers up, supporting me, would be sweet too; this could be the nut germ of a plan.

Man, I sound mean, don't ? These aren't my long-term plans, but they seem to be what I'm motivated on focusing on, so I think my shrink and i should focus on running my critics down, till I no longer feel like doing so. We could focus on a three-month plan of revenge, and then see if I still want revenge and recognition, or if I want to do other things.

Thinking on my family makes feel angry because they make me feel trapped, and thus I want to assert control away from them; I fear them and so , I want to confront them, very bad. Instead of evading it, let's jump in with both feet.

The very thought of doing so, actually makes me feel happier, and more in control, so let's roll with it.