I have often felt like I've tried to make the same point to my T about our therapeutic relationship issues a thousand different ways. The only thing I didn't do was draw pictures. And then he would say I hadn't asked for what I needed. I was much like you, thinking I needed to say it again with this emotion or in that state or on this day, etc. etc. But I started to question, at what point is it his job to probe behind whatever I was saying (or not saying) to get to the source of the problem? I felt like I always adapting to how he needed things done. I kind of thought I was just supposed to be "me" and he would help me sort out my needs and what my defenses were. It started to become too much like every other relationship I had in which I felt I was doing all the work, the analyzing, the adapting, and in the end, getting very little out of it.

Didn't you say your therapist was a CBT guy but you had been hoping for a more psychodynamically inclined therapist? (I may be remembering that incorrectly.) Anyway, there may just be limits to who he can be which is absolutely no reflection on you.

There is certainly nothing at all wrong with trying to tell him again and again what you need and how you feel. Try writing it, try recording it, try any way you can. Again here's a MY ISSUES ALERT: I received similar advice. It's sound and good advice and appropriate most of the time and in most situations in life. However, I believe there is a limit. How many times should you try to discuss the same issue without a satisfactory outcome? I tried for 4 years. I'm just now learning that I'm not going to ever get anything close to a good response. And 4 years are gone.

Just something to think about which is very tainted by my experience so take it with many, many grains of salt.

So, so sorry you're hurting.