Hi- I've been thinking about you, and hoping you are OK. Thought about you during the night (I always wake up every few hours, very poor sleeper these days)
and I was very worried about you.

Although we are strangers, I feel like I know you better than I should (how you feel)...Maybe it's because we have certain things in common,
E.G. I used to work as a clinical RN in hospitals (in my 20's-30's)...I am now alone...I've had some (few) unhealthy chaotic relationships,
and most important,
I often feel worse than I should when "rejected",
whether it be a boyfriend, husband, friend or sometimes even strangers.
Plus, Being Alone, is the only time (these days) that I feel safe.
(Sometimes, and likely too often, to survive life I need to be away from chaos and the dumb things people too often say and do).

BUT, this is why
I'm strongly suggesting that you GET OUT,
(fresh air, different environment, even if it is hiding in the back of a library or corner booth of a diner).
do something nice for yourself,
and try NOT to evaluate your life and future,
UNTIL you're feeling better.

YOU ARE DEFINITELY TAKING ON TOO MUCH,
AT A TIME
YOU ARE NOT FEELING WELL ENOUGH
to deal with even the basics of everyday life.

(Your dissatisfaction with your job will be there tomorrow, next week, next month, etc. Your relationship too may need to be put on hold (blocked out) to deal with another day).

Pick only ONE PROBLEM to think about and fix today. (something simple).
It took years for your life to get to this point (good and bad), and you can't fix or think about EVERYTHING in one day.

Actually my gut advice to you,
is don't even try to "fix" anything today.
Clear your head, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF,
and when you are in a better frame of mind,
list the things you want to change
(to make your life better, happier and more enjoyable), prioritize,
and focus on ONLY one problem at a time.

Hugs & wishing U only the best

I want you to have a Peaceful, Positive & Productive day.

Only do and think about things that will help you to reach that goal=PPP
Peaceful...Positive and Productive.

When I get out-of-control and overwhelmed, I repeat those 3 words to my self, like I ask myself,
what can I do right now, that will lead to me having a Peaceful, Positive & Productive day?
...And then I do those one or 2 simple things.

Right now I'm going to,
1). Get something to eat (I'm starved) and then next,
2). I'm going to resume working for a few hours so my customers don't call/email and harass me, for not meeting my deadlines this week...
Btw, what does "tbh" stand for?

And, if this post sounds "dumb" please just ignore it, or laugh at it, since I'm likely one "of those dumb people U need to IGNORE today- LOL (just kidding).