I’m thinking about leaving work to go home because I feel horrible and can’t think. My thoughts are so jumbled and broken, they feel like froth, so mixed together that they are muddy. I can’t stay present, I space out but have no idea what I’m thinking about. My skin feels so sensitive that I keep getting waves of goosebumps. I want to peel it off. I can’t stop picking at it. I want to throw up all of my insides to relieve the pounding pressure. I want to smash all the windows. I’m lucky I sit where people don’t see me because I keep curling up and clenching all my muscles to try to release a little energy. If I go out and walk around in the sunlight, it’s going to spin me up even more. I can’t do simple tasks. I can’t talk to people because someone already commented “you sound like a crazy person.” I could take some extra Seroquel, but then I might end up like a zombie, and I’m not sure that would be a better arrangement. Maybe it would. I will take extra tonight as that’s what my pdoc has directed me to do when I feel like this. I just…ugh this is so uncomfortable!