Hello, especially a note to Amanda.

I need to add something about this. I guess what I was asking about in the first question/part relates to the incredible loss that is incurred personally via DID: Specifically, the loss of family connections as well as the loss of time that has been connected to others in the past so that relationships could be formed and ongoing-- basically, the effects of the episodic nature of the disorder.

For me personally, the years I was coming and going all over the place made it impossible for me to establish long term relationships. This situation even today translates into me feeling, in myself, to be like an immigrant/transplant to my own world --simply because I have so little in common with most people I meet. I have no shared past to speak of. “I” was not there for many years. “I” was not present in my own awareness for many of the things that became signature events for my own generation. Factor in my age when I went into therapy the final time and was diagnosed (56?) and my age today : almost seventy. Most of my life was lived looking through different sets of eyes. I am only recently here as one whole and self identifying self aware person.

With regard to my own abusers, I no longer have any one of them in my life and I no longer have to deal with them in any way whatsoever. When they were alive, however, that was a differnt story and it was very hard on me and frankly, being around them triggered my dissociation repeatedly.

As for the medications, I wasnt suggesting that DID cant be treated without drugs. Just the opposite.

I guess what I am saying is that I am not in therapy any longer and anything I post is related to the questions I have regarding the nature of DID itself. Also, on a personal note, while I had this disorder in the past for many years, I also went through years of therapy and self help practices. I actually am here today now as one whole self identifying and fully aware person. Given that, today, my concerns might be called academic because they are based on what I read in relation to what I have personally expereinced.

Not everyone in psychiatry accepts or understands DID and for many people they dont get to pick their therapist ; he/she is assigned. In my area (where I live) ,in fact, psychotherapy is being phased out more and more and the emphasis on is on the managment of patients on psychotropic medications. Insurance and money plays a big aprt in this and that of course also has bearing on the quality of life a mental patient will have. Then consider the fact that psychiatry has a rather high incidence of patient misdiagnosis, and that misdiagnosis in psyhe often means a person is given drugs that hurt rather than help them, and this in turn impedes and complicates any future therapy and healing.

Among other things I am wondering about, I guess I am asking if others are concerned that the field of psychiatry itself has grown more dependent on basing everthing on a purely biological cause? It seems like everyone is taking one psychtropic drug or another in the country. I find that truly alarming.

I have another observation /question: In the course of my early life especially, I have spent a lot of time in psychiatric wards. I have known a lot of people with mental illnesses and or emtoional problems. What I find compelling is there seems to be a strong correlation between childhood abuse and neglect and developing mental illness. It seems like everyone I ever got close to and talked with had been the victim of childhood sexual abuse.

If there is in fact, a correlation between early ongoing childhood abuse and the later development of a mental illness, maybe it is related to how we handle this problem. I have to ask: What would happen if the abusers were called out and put away removed from society -- instead of the victims ending up being called crazy?

While your own case is quite remarkable, I think most abusers are not outed and prosecuted, and in fact go on to continue to abuse and exploit children for as long as they live. Maybe if our society addressed the sexual and violent abuse of little children in a more aggressive and comprehensive manner we would have less people ending up in a psychiatrists' office or mental hospital.